The only acceptable birthday cake
so when you blow out that candle you’ll be killing that charmander happy birthday u sick fuk
… to be fair, you are going to follow up the murder by carving up and serving its corpse to your friends and family.
one time in an interview Zac Efron said that he loved death note and idk if he was just saying that bc the interviewer mentioned it or what but the point is Zac Efron may be a closet weeb
does this look like a coincidence to you?
hyenas, terrifying and excellently organized predators of the savannah
also surprisingly docile and like neck scritches and have a tail chasing compulsion
if you don’t think hyenas are great then you’re objectively wrong
Aaaahhh, I love hyenas. :D
Hyenas: Always getting a bad rap because lions are jerks. Lions actually steal from hyenas most of the time because hyenas are the better predators — but they’re also very skittish when faced with a giant pride of cats. Adorable babies!
Okay, lemme tell you about spotted hyenas, aka the BAMFiest BAMFs in the animal kingdom.
- Their societies are entirely female-dominated. Female hyenas are larger and stronger than males and have higher social status in clan hierarchy - even the lowest-ranking female in a hyena clan is higher up the social ladder than the highest-ranking male. They’re basically the Amazons of the animal world. The females even have false penis-like appendages (which are essentially large clitorises), which led the ancient Greeks to think that hyenas were hermaphrodites. Because fuck your narrow human perceptions of sex and gender roles, that’s why.
- They are considered the dominant predators of the African savannah, despite not being the largest or strongest, because they are the most successful hunters. Their hunting success rate is estimated to be about 70-80%, meaning that they catch about 70-80% of prey they pursue - a freakishly high statistic (to compare, the success rate of lions and wolves is about 20-30%). They also scavenge much less than lions do, as whowasntthere said, and are incredibly adaptable and opportunistic predators, meaning that they are also the most common and widespread of the large African carnivores. That’s not too bad for an animal typecast as a lazy scavenger.
- Their jaws are some of the strongest in the animal kingdom, stronger than those of lions, tigers, wolves or perhaps bears, and can crush elephant and giraffe bones; hyenas are also able to digest all bone matter. Don’t tell me that’s not metal as fuck.
- Despite looking like dogs, they are not part of the dog family and are actually more closely related to cats. Because fuck your logic. Nature does what it wants.
- They are incredibly intelligent. They are easily as intelligent as primates and some scientists claim that their intelligence may even rival that of the great apes, which would make them among the most intelligent animals in the world. Hyenas even outperform chimpanzees on some tests, which is pretty damn awesome, considering that chimpanzees are our closest relatives and all.
So yeah, basically hyenas are awesome and badass as well as truly fascinating animals and if you don’t have at least a bit of respect for them you’re wrong.
HYENAS ARE PERFECT
oh my god they did it!
This is probably the most impressive and beautiful thing I’ve seen in years.
This is amazing. As much as i joke about wanting new legs, I hope this gives amputees much wanted freedom.
i made a fan design of the guy on the phone bc i am weird and pathetic
i imagine he’s a young jittery guy who got stuck in the job trying to pay off college loans…he’s optimistic despite his situation, but is still often anxious. he has a lot of injuries from dealing with freddy and pals :3c
i wouldve beaten the game faster but this asshat kept killing me